Friday, August 1, 2008

SHE'S HERE!


SHE'S HERE! Phew! After all that waiting, Ava Veronica Heugel has finally arrived! She was born at 10:10 pm on July 28th, 2008. She was 20 inches long, weighing in at 6 lbs 12 and 1/2 oz. What a day!

I had stayed up until 4 am that morning knitting what I hoped would eventually resemble a blanket, aware that I had a doctor's appointment at 9 am but not too concerned, as I was fairly sure that I wasn't any further dialated and I certainly wasn't having any further contractions. I just figured that I'd go in, have my membranes painfully stripped away AGAIN, and then go back and wince until I drifted off to sleep again.

How wrong I was. Well, partially.

I went in for my appointment, groggy and annoyed. Further fueling my annoyance was how late the office was running behind schedule. A half hour after my appointment was scheduled, bladder about to burst, they finally called me back. Lilyana, the office nurse, led me back to the exam room, took my blood pressure, and patted me on the knee, aware of my impatience to get the child OUT. 15 minutes later, my doctor finally arrived. As usual, she started out looking for the baby's heartbeat. Not as usual, she had a bit of a hard time finding it, and frowned when she finally did. She began the dreaded internal, again noting that I wasn't really any further dialated, but instead of the stripping I'd been dreading, she pulled her hand out earlier than usual. I looked up to see the same frown, but didn't think anything of it until I saw blood on her hand.

Bright red blood. A lot of it.

Before I could ask what was going on, she calmly stated that I needed to go over to Labor and Delivery right away for monitoring as the baby's heartbeat was not as strong as she would like. She rushed out of the room, saying she would call ahead and let them know I was coming.

I redressed myself, shaking. What did this mean? Why was I bleeding? Certainly that wasn't just my water breaking. Was the baby ok?

I called the boy and my mom on the way over. The boy had slept even less than I had under the same assumptions I had made and was probably less excited than me, but his concern overwhelmed any level of exhaustion. My mom asked why the baby's heart was slow and what had caused the bleeding, but hell if I had any answers. I just told her I'd call her once I knew what was up.

This visit to the hospital was a tid bit different than times past (obviously). I really had just assumed nothing big was up until they handed me the hospital gown. Before, I'd just hand to strip from the waist down and jump on the bed. Suddenly, things were looking far more serious. Still, though, there were no contractions or leaking water or even dialation, so it couldn't be today... could it?

Well, I was right about there being no signs, but concerned with the slower heart rate, the doctor decided we would induce. She prescribed an enema and a pictocin drip immediately. Like it or not, Ava was comin' out.

Well, so I had thought. At first, the contractions were no biggie. The boy dozed on and off in the chair next to me. I finally talked him into going to get something to eat when they put the catheter in, but aside from that, he just sat there trying to rest and jumping whenever the steady sound of the baby's heartbeat on the monitor spiked or lagged. Unfortunately, the contractions became more and more intense. Those of you who know me know that I am not good with pain. Like, at all. I put it off for as long as possible, knowing that I wouldn't get an epidural until I was at least 3 cm dialated, but soon I was begging for Demerol. An hour later, I needed another dose. An hour after that, I was begging for a c-section. My doctor told me she refused to perform one without medical need, and that she would now be breaking my water.

It sounds so simple. Like breaking a water balloon or something.

Yeah, right.

I screamed bloody murder, sobbing hysterically. Even after she stopped what she was doing, the pain continued. She had the nerve to get annoyed, saying the monitor wasn't even showing a contraction. Great idea- tell the hysterical woman she's being a baby. That'll get her to shut up right away. I continued to squirm and scream, convinced I was dying, blubbering that I wasn't strong enough to do this. Fortunately, I was 4 cm dialated, so I could finally get my epidural.

The boy had done very well. I knew he was scared, but he kept his cool as much as possible to help me keep what was left of mine. However, we both knew that getting the epidural would not be an absolute solution. Neither of us wanted to think about the length of the needle that was about to be inserted into my spinal cord, especially with me squirming in agony with each contraction. It was inevitable that a contraction would occur during the process, and if I didn't keep still, that needle could go in the wrong way, and.... I don't even want to think about it.

In any case, the anesthesiologist, Adam, and my nurse, Cristina (a saint, by the way) were all in the room. Adam was standing in front of me, holding my hands. They had just numbed the area, and a contraction kicked in. I was doing my damndest to keep still when all of the sudden...

"Now walk it out, walk it out, now walk it out..."

The far from soothing melody of one of the single most obnoxious songs to hear when you're in pain began to emanate from Adam's speaker phone. My blood began to boil and all capacity for rational thought vaporized in a split second. Quivering, I looked up with rage in my eyes.

"Turn.... off... that.... PHONE!!!!"

Poor Adam (yeah, there's no point in shielding identity anymore... and I'm lazy). He looked at me like a cornered animal about to be struck. He stammered something about not being able to get over to the phone because of where the anesthesiologist was standing, but such logic had no bearing on my demand. The nurse saw the beast emerging and moved to turn off the phone, but stopped mid-stride, giving Adam a funny look?

"Are you ok?" she asked.

"I'm fine," he said. "I should probably just drink something."

I let out a guttural yell, and she forgot Adam and moved towards the still ringing phone. At that moment, disaster struck. Adam went rigid, twitched, and began a fall backwards that seemed to last forever. He hit his head on the cabinet, fell to the side, and slammed it against a porcelain sink.

So there I am, needle being inserted into the spine, mid-contraction, love of my life unconscious on the ground, and totally freaking out. The nurse rushed to Adam's side as a flurry of other doctors and nurses entered the room and people started yelling things. I just kept crying as they brought him around. The only plus side to all of this was that I paid zero attention to the epidural being put in, and by the time they had Adam sitting up in a wheel chair, it was over and done with. They laid me down and began trying to convince Adam to go to the emergency room, but he refused (We still don't know why he passed out). This probably would have been more disconcerting, but within minutes the epidural kicked in, which is why the rest of the details from the hospital should be taken with a grain of salt, because DAMN those drugs were good.

While I departed to happy land, my mom and sister Brittany arrived. If I wasn't happy from the meds already, I was ecstatic then. I don't think anyone can truly appreciate their mom until their about to become one. In that moment, I was genuinely apologetic for putting her through hell for 36 hours before deciding to come out. I don't know how she did it.

The other thing, though, is that with the meds came a lack of conscious thought. As the nurses and doctors came in for continual examination, I didn't care anymore who saw what, when. Again, my mom had told me this would happen, but the evaporation of my modesty still seems rather mind boggling. My poor sister saw way more of me than she had ever anticipated.

Unfortunately, this happy fog was interrupted by the doctor coming in for an examination. My legs went up willingly, but came back down quickly as she shook her head.

"Lauren, you're still only dialated to four. We've given you all the pictocin we can. We're going to need to do a c-section."

These words cut through the fog like the knife she was proposing. Though just hours earlier I would have cried in gratitude, fear now seized me tightly. This was a major surgery. There were a lot of potential complications, and recovery was not supposed to be fun. Adam, my rock, even let his facade crack a little as fear flitted across his face. I gripped his hand.

"Is that really necessary?"

The doctor looked back at me with annoyance written plainly across her face.

"Yes."

I nodded, and she began barking orders to nurses for preparation. It was explained that they would up my epidural dosage so that I would be numb basically from the shoulders down. A bunch of questions were asked, but I don't remember a whole lot from this time span. I suddenly was freezing cold, and my teeth wouldn't stop chattering. I just kept trying to find my mom's face in the swarm, trying to stay calm and keep my grip on Adam's hand. I was panicked about the surgery, about the baby, about how prepared I was. This was it. She was coming out. Suddenly I was totally without confidence; was I really ready for this?

Little too late for that thought, huh?

They wheeled me down the corridor and into the operating room. This was even colder than my room and the hallways, and the walls echoed with instruments clanging about and my teeth smacking against each other uncontrollably. They strapped my arms down and I fought back tears. This was not how it was supposed to happen!

After what seemed like forever, they let Adam come in. At this point, they had put a sheet up in front of my face so I couldn't see my stomach being cut open. As much as I didn't want to watch, Adam was petrified. The whole time, as I fought to stay conscious, he held my hand and looked me in the eyes, telling me to stay with him. I don't think either of us have ever been so afraid. We couldn't hear anything at all, until in the middle of the sterile clanging...

There she was. Her cry, in that moment, was the sweetest sound I have ever heard. The doctor brought her behind the curtain, and Adam and I took in the sight of our dark haired, squalling, beautiful baby girl. Tears rolled down both of our faces. After months of waiting, wondering, dreaming... she was more wonderful that we could have ever anticipated.

He held my hand tightly while the took her into the corner to clean her up. You know, I know I've said it again and again on this blog, but wow.... I am so in love with this man.

The nurses called for him to follow them to the nursery, and I was again alone. Luckily, the emotional roller coaster and medical cocktail being pumped into my vein had left me exhausted, and I quickly passed out. I vaguely remember being rolled to "recovery," and I think I had an exchange with one of the nurses about how Madea's Family Reunion was better than Diary of a Mad Black Woman. At some point (I have no idea how much time passed), they rolled me into my room in the maternity ward. Adam, my mom and sister came in (I think) a few minutes later, followed closely by my beautiful little girl.

She is SO tiny. I mean, babies are small to begin with but she was was really small, especially for a child born into my family. She's like the size of a junior league football, and weighs less than my siamese kitten. But wow. She looks SO much like her daddy. Big, gorgeous brown eyes, a full head of dark hair, and the most precious little mouth you could imagine. I was in total awe. Let's be real- I still am.

At this point, the drugs were still thick. Over the next few days, they began to wear off, and I had to request pain killers. Modesty was still not a priority (as several of my visiting team mates found out the hard way), and learning to nurse was anything but easy (more on that later), but that Friday we arrived home, my new little family.

The past two weeks have been the most painful, joyful, tumultuous and miraculous of my life. Though some lessons have been learned the hard way, and there are many more to come, I am so blissfully happy.

Though this blog was originally intended to just chronicle the pregnancy, I think I'll keep it up. I hope you keep reading, be you friends and family far away, or just looking for a chuckle at our expense. It's sure to be a humorous adventure.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Bout to Pop

Ok, so now I'm just waiting. I'm soooo over this. I went to the doctor again this morning. She said the cervix is even more soft, the mucus plug coming out is a good sign, the baby dropped way low, but I'm no further dialated. In an effort to speed things along, she stripped the membranes. Again.

OW.

I think I've said enough about that, though. Needless to say, it set off some inconsistent contractions, but nothing more. Now I'm doing nothing with my time and waiting for her to pop out. I've now taught myself to knit and am trying to make the baby a blanket, but my arms get sore, so I have to take breaks. Usually I go on walks, but seeing as this blog is also a source of entertainment for some, I thought I'd provide you with what is, in my opinion, the best of YouTube baby videos. Enjoy!

Scared Kids:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XG0lQXR6gzA&NR=1 (have to wait till the end for the funniest part)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pup-Ydpn4z8&feature=related (again, wait for it)

Kids and bad language:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_pj2Nutu5v8&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uq05IcLBEBM&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkkvoipubtQ&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lOozkxLp1A&feature=related

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/74

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/33f2687080

Laughing at their expense:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9yAkBSrMk0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OBlgSz8sSM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pihygVBjAYU&feature=related (wait till the end)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nG6ieU89tJM&feature=related

Baby Laughter:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5P6UU6m3cqk&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_mBLWpdwnI&NR=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXXm696UbKY&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41BvNhzl83Y

Teeheehee. Maybe one day I'll have such amusing videos about Ava.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Stripped

So I had my appointment yesterday morning. I went in thinking that perhaps my doctor would pull out a planner and ask if Wednesday at 9 am or Thursday at 2 pm was better for me for an induction, but no such luck. Instead, I walked in blindly to a rather painful experience. As the doctor performed the internal (which is uncomfortable to begin with), a frown crossed her face. Hand still thrust within she said, "Well, you're still not dialated enough to induce. What I'm going to do now is strip your membranes, hopefully get things moving."

OW.

Yeah, so that hurt. A lot. I sat there wincing, completely clueless about what the hell she was doing. As she snapped her gloves off, she said she'd see me at 9 am on Thursday and we'd see where to go from there.

OW.

The drive home was nerve-wracking. I was in so much pain, but it wasn't the wave-like pain that so many women describe when discussing contractions. Instead, it was like someone had stuck some kind of pole into my insides and was twisting slowly and deliberately- like my internal organs were functioning like a towel being twisted. I called my mom to let her know what was up, and she sounded just as quizzical as I felt. I begrudgingly crawled into bed, though sleep was probably a good hour away as I lay writhing in discomfort.

OW.

I didn't get up again until like 2 in the afternoon, and by the the pain had subsided somewhat. It was at this point that I decided to figure out what the hell my doctor had actually done to me. As I read, the pain suddenly made perfect sense. "Stripping of the membranes" is a practice that is used not necessarily to induce labor, but to bring it closer and make induction a possibility. The amniotic fluid sac is attached to the side of a woman's uterus by thin layers of mucus. A doctor who wants to "strip the membranes" will insert her fingers into the pregnant woman and swipe this natural adhesive away, functionally having it float around.

This can have a variety of effects. If the woman is already super close to labor, this will set off a chain of contractions, and voila, baby en route. If not, it puts more pressure on the sac via gravity which can cause the water to break and contractions to start. If you're really close to labor as it is, this will set off labor usually in the first 24 hours (no such luck here), but the typical window for it to get the party started is 72 hours. In my case, that will be the start time of my next doctor's appointment.

Well, further armed with knowledge about what was going on in my body, I decided to start walking around in hopes that all the jostling combined with the newly liberated status of the amniotic fluid sac would cause my water to break. No go, but it did cause some contractions. We'll see what happens on today's constitutional.

One interesting note, I think my mucus plug dislodged today. I know I had already talked about this occurring, but the plug can grow back, and given that its last appearance was spotting only, it's possible that it did not fully dislodge last time. However, this time around, the discharge was far more... plug like. I won't gross you out any more than that.

The point is, things are getting closer every hour. A bunch of people are in town this weekend for some of my coaches' wedding, so maybe Ava will arrive in time to meet the whole crew. We'll just have to wait and see. Time to go walk it out. Wish me luck!

Saturday, July 19, 2008

I have less patience than my kitten

Well, my water hasn't broken. Contractions aren't regular. Only thing I can count on is my back killing me without a thing I can do about it. Like I've said before, though, I'm not going to go waste my time in the hospital to have them tell me that I'm not in labor yet- especially since I know that already. GAHHH. I just keep thinking about Monday- my light at the end of the tunnel. It's unlikely that my doctor will induce labor ON Monday if it's something she wants to do anyways; she's far too scheduled for it to happen that way. Still, answers or timelines or time "horizons" if you prefer Bush lingo would be FANTASTIC.

I'm more than ready. The car is packed, the house is clean, I've made Ava a dress that actually has a ghost of a chance of fitting for once, plans have been made for when the family will descend, and I even think the cats (subconsciously) are prepared for her arrival. I find myself continuously watching the clock without an end in sight. I'm staying hydrated and active- where is she!?

Friday, July 18, 2008

Who's the real baby?

Owwwwwww. I'm freakin' miserable right now. I guess it started last night. I went to go see "The Dark Knight" (which was, by the way, AMAZING), and within minutes of sitting down in the theater, was experiencing bad lower back pain. I just wrote it off to bad movie theater seating, and chose to grit my teeth through the film rather than miss a minute of Heath Ledger's performance (totally Oscar-worthy, in my book). By the time I got home, I was so pre-occupied with the film and so wiped out that I wrote the back pain off as a casualty of cinematic bliss and headed to sleep.

Not only did I sleep fitfully with nightmare after nightmare, I woke up several times to pee, and would wind up hurting badly. Again, though, I was so tired that I would eventually drift off. I wound up waking up around noon, as the boy and I were both working at one. My back continued to hurt, and I just felt like crap. No matter how I sat or laid down, no matter how I stretched or rested, the pain persisted. I was exhausted, too. I took a nap part way through my day, but could have slept for hours longer.

When I finally finished my work for the day around 8 pm (no, I didn't work for 7 hours; my job is very flexible and from home), I still felt awful. However, the possibility of the doctor inducing on Monday (however slim it may be) has been weighing heavily on my mind, so I announced to the boy that I'd be back in a bit after I cleaned the bathroom. Well, I had the best of intentions. I walked to the restroom and promptly walked- well, more like slouchingly shuffled- back to the couch. He was in the middle of a video game, which usually translates into on a different planet, but he slowly set down the controller and came to my side, trying to figure out what was going off. I brushed him off, saying I was just having a contraction. Most guys might freak out when they hear that, but my guy has heard it so frequently with all the false labor issues I've had that he just nodded with a look of skepticism and eventually returned to his game.

Well, after eating the super nutritious dinner of Domino's pizza (my hellish day had translated into a lack of grocery shopping, and thus no food in the house), I was still hurting. I have tried to be very conservative with any kind of pain killers these days just in case labor does come and it might interfere with my ability to be given an epidural (not even sure if that's a rational concern, but I'm pregnant and don't need to be rational). However, facing a long evening of misery, I bit the bullet and took one Tylenol 3 with Codeine.

That was probably an hour and a half to two hours ago. I still hurt. My upper back pain is pretty constant, and I'll chalk that one up to the strain my humongous breasts are exerting, but my lower back pain is coming in waves. I had read that for women who experience "back labor," this is how it starts. However, after two false alarms and wasted trips to the hospital, I am not going anywhere until I absolutely have to. Now, that may be in a couple of hours, or that may wait until my doctor's appointment on Monday. Personally, I'm hoping that whatever this pain is goes away quickly or produces a child in my arms pronto (well, not quite- I still want to get the bathroom cleaned).

I'm going to go back to the fetal position again. Wish me luck.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

HAHAHAHA- you are kidding, right?

So the pregnancy forum (I know, I know- but it's not the same situation as before).... Man, I swear, if you're ever bored, just go check out these message boards. You'll cry, you'll laugh, you'll recoil in disgust, you'll want to hand out free hugs, potentially get knocked up yourself... This latest post I read, though, sent me off on a rant of a response which turned out to be a very enlightening process for myself.

So this girl is going into her senior year of college. She's married. She wants to have kids. All good. I get it. However, she also is going to be a teacher, so she has mapped out a million and one reasons why the best timing for her to conceive anytime in the near future is basically... now. She seems pretty intelligent, and this is obviously something that she and her husband have thought a lot about. To be honest, in a perfect world, their reasoning would make a lot of sense.

Unfortunately, as I've learned over the past year, nothing is ever perfect. The road ahead is always bumpy, curvy and sometimes out entirely. In my response, I shared how difficult pregnancy was for me during the school year, and went on to ask a bunch of questions about their "game plan." It's your senior year; isn't your course load going to be more difficult? Are you working? How will you save enough to afford allllll of the baby gear that's required and the medical care that is so important beforehand? Remember that pregnancy can be exhausting; will you have the energy for classes AND work? How will you afford rent, utilities, groceries, diapers, doctors visits, baby supplies and clothes, etc., with both of you only working part-time as substitute teachers? Plus, random one time expenses can throw the best laid plans off their axis. Do you have a savings base built up?

After I read through what I had written, I realized I sounded like a raving lunatic, so I put a caveat at the bottom saying that not everyone has the same experiences, and love is the most important ingredient, etc., etc. However, her story continues to resonate with me. This has been one of the hardest years of my life, and I know things are not about to get any easier. Looking back, I know I would never have chosen the path that I'm on, though it has been tremendously rewarding in some respects. I keep hearing my mom in the back of my head, clucking away that she could warn me and advise me all she wanted, but I wouldn't really understand or appreciate what she had to say until I was going through it myself. She was right. It's been much harder than I anticipated in some ways (though easier in others), and almost every turn in the road was one she had warned me about.

So I can post all I want for this girl, or anyone else. To be honest, it's all just one bit roll of the dice. We can't plan out life like it's one of this girl's lesson plans, or a debate case, or itinerary. Life's messy. You're going to get dirty. Things won't turn out the way you plan them. So I guess I'll just keep laughing, because a sense of humor is the only thing that is ALWAYS a good idea.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Waiting sucks

Oh baby, oh baby, oh baby.

I wish she were here already! I have done everything I can think of. The nursery is set, the house is clean, and I'm getting to the point that I'm compulsivley cleaning things that don't need to be cleaned just so I feel useless. I can't even let myself just relax and do nothing. For example, today I put together a puzzle, watched a movie and texted back and forth all at once. I still felt like I wasn't doing enough. I'm going absolutely stir crazy.

I guess I will just have to wait. I have a doctor's appointment on Thursday, so we'll see what she has to say about potential arrival times. Oh Ava- would you hurry up already?